XVI.

This trip may have been for my benefit, but there were still certain tasks we both had to complete before the Jedi masks could be shed completely. The cabin hadn't been used in a long time, and certain corners of it had been claimed by a family of mice. Using a Force suggestion, I drove them into the small barn nearby for the duration of our visit before cleaning up after them.

Locating the mattress to the bed rolled up in a sealed closet, I tossed it on the floor before the fire, then retrieved fresh linen from the same closet and made the bed. Thick fur rugs were also in that closet, kept safe from gnawing little teeth; I spread those over the mattress before the fireplace, where we'd likely be sleeping, as the bedroom was far too cold and narrow. Not only that, I'd arbitrarily decided the bed was too small, never mind we'd put the mattress to good use.

Qui-Gon chopped wood while I worked, preparing for the thunderstorms he told me had been forecast for our five-cycle stay. So much for dabbling in the pond.

I had begun dinner when Qui-Gon came through the doorway, ducking his head to avoid hitting it on the low frame and carrying an armful of wood to the fireplace in the common room.

There was no light available except the fire and a couple of wall sconces in the bedroom and small bath. I relished the lack of technology, even going so far as to appreciate the challenge of preparing our meals in the fireplace using a primitive Dutsch oven. I knew how to use it; I'd done so often enough over fires built on prairies on ten different worlds, but had never had occasion to test my skills indoors. It wasn't that great of a challenge, with canned stew and homemade dumplings cooking over the fire. A few greens gathered from the surrounding woods completed the meal, along with a favorite tea, which I'd learned years ago to never travel without.

"Supper will be ready after your shower, Master."

"Thank you, Obi-Wan."

We were being formal, just bit stiff with each other and not quite meeting each others' eyes -- like new lovers who didn't quite know where to put their words. We had shared plain quarters before on missions, but this wasn't a mission. By my Master's decree earlier in the day, we weren't here to behave like Jedi, we were here to be just men.

I wondered how long the awkwardness would last between us. Could we relate to each other without ancient-prescribed roles and assigned modes of behavior? Would our touching be made easier or impossible by the removal of our masks? I suspected that my Master was way ahead of me, having asked himself these same questions before deciding that Dorsia was the place to go.

Taking the oven from the fire, I set it on the stone hearth and stacked two plates beside it. Much to my relief, I'd discovered utensils and mugs in a nearby wooden chest. The tea was ready, steeped and steaming in its pot.

Leaving my preparations, I padded down the hallway in time to see Qui-Gon emerge, naked and dripping, from the shower. Tossing aside a towel, he smiled when I grabbed another towel and gestured that he should sit on the bed. I took advantage of the view before me while I towel-dried his hair; a big Master sitting in the nude and very relaxed before me. I found his manhood flaccid but still of considerable size and definitely beautiful, as was the rest of the long-legged, broad-shouldered, lean body.

Qui-Gon's hair was down to his waist now, a concession from my request months ago that he let it grow. I trimmed it from time to time, but cutting it short had never been discussed between us again. It was pulled well back in battle, and had never been a threat to either of our lives.

I combed it out now, knowing the snags and tangles that would result if I didn't, and that Qui-Gon would have no patience and likely simply rip them out, rather than coax them out.

"No hair-tie tonight?" I asked as I finished.

"If you wish it."

Qui-Gon dressed in casual sweats that matched my own and pulled the long mass of heavy hair free to let it flow down his back. I followed him out to the common area, enjoying the way his shoulders moved beneath the material as he walked, the way his long legs ate up the space. Settling cross-legged opposite him, I offered him a plate and settled back with my own meal.

Dinner was a companionable time, with the firelight and the silence offering an ambiance that could have been matched only by the silence of our own quarters. This felt different, however, for no mission summons would call us away from our peace this time, no signal from the comp would interfere with our solitude, no irritations from Council or fellow Jedi would intrude.

Setting his empty plate aside, Qui-Gon leaned back and regarded me with a look that was almost predatory. His blue eyes turned dark in the firelight, and they seemed to smolder as I finished eating. Leaning forward, he took the plate and set it aside before going up on his knees as he had on the balcony and taking my lips in a feathery kiss.

"You want me." he murmured against my mouth, his fingers caressing my cheek. "You've always wanted me."

"From the time I figured out what I was meant to do with... it, yes."

"Yet you never told me. Why not?"

His cool, dry hands stole beneath the edge of my sweatshirt. One played at the edge of my pants, the fingers of the other hand found my nipple and was rubbing, rubbing, until the nub responded.

"Yes, you want me," he purred to feel my response. "But why never tell me?"

I'd never known my nipples could be so sensitive, or that my Master could be so direct about what he wanted. Slapping my hand over his outside of the cloth, I breathed deeply and tried to answer coherently. Qui-Gon had done nothing but kiss me, nothing but touch me and I felt heavy, with my heart thudding painfully against my ribs, just under his hand.

"I didn't believe you'd ever want me," I answered. "Not like this, as I think you want me tonight."

Leaning down, he licked my wrist, then up to the base of my fingers. His beard rasped slightly, while his mouth nuzzled and sucked at my skin, seeming to just... taste me. I'd never known that a beard could feel so good.

"Obi-Wan." My name was a growl coming from deep within him. "Never doubt that I want you."

Retreating from the sweatshirt, his hands curled around its hem and tugged. Raising my arms, I let him pull the shirt off of me. It was cast aside, and then he reached for my arm. Just my arm. I watched, fascinated, when Qui-Gon stretched it out before him, turned it palm up, and nuzzled his way from my wrist to the inside of my elbow.

Scratching his beard back down the way he had come, he lapped at my skin all the way like some great cat. Reaching my elbow once more, he nipped higher only to close his teeth carefully over my biceps. Tightening by increments, he waited until pressure became pain and I shifted restlessly. Releasing the skin, he licked and sucked at the teeth marks he had made with his experiment.

Nosing his way beneath my arm and into my armpit, he moaned softly. "You taste exquisite. You smell even better."

Did he plan on tasting every inch of me? The other arm was treated to the same ministrations, until I noticed that my Master's hand were trembling. This exploration wasn't seduction; it seemed closer to veneration, even worship when he urged me to remove my sweat pants and lie down. Kneeling between my legs, Qui-Gon ghosted his fingers up my thighs, only to slide his hand beneath one and urge me to lift my leg. Bending forward on a low growl, he tasted and nuzzled his way upward until I was shaking harder than he was.

"Master...."

"Let me love you, my Obi-Wan."

The words came softly past his lips. Words that I would hear echoing forever in the empty places inside of me, places my Master now seemed determined to fill. There was nowhere, within or without, that he could not reach. I was surrounded and penetrated by him even now, and I craved it with my entire soul.

"Gods... don't stop, Master." I shivered. "Just don't stop."

I cried out when he found my testicles. He sucked one of them into the wet sanctuary of his mouth, and I bucked. Yelled something incomprehensible, even to me. Drawing back with a hummed inquiry, he lifted his head and considered my panting desperation. Smiling, he spread his long fingers across my hips and then lowered his head to invite my testicle back into his hot sanctuary behind his teeth.

I bucked again, but Qui-Gon held me down, his fingers digging into my hips so hard that I knew there would be bruising. I didn't care; I wanted more of that wet, eager suction that was holding me captive. I wanted him to swarm over me, into me, to thrust hard and home and never let go. I never wanted to know a moment when he wasn't filling me, and he knew it. Could feel every bit of it through the open bond.

His mouth took the other testicle and I cried out, my fingers digging into the furs. It wasn't enough, it wasn't nearly enough, and yet it was too much. Aeons later, when I'd filled to capacity and was throbbing with need, Qui-Gon stopped sucking and raised his head once more. My erection stood tall and proud, pulsing with the need he'd created, and he looked every bit as proud as he'd looked when I come in first at last spring's Padawan lightsaber competition.

"Sith," I breathed, wanting to ground out the word and add a few more colorful ones in Huttese to the mix. But I was a quivering, incoherent mess of desire, with nowhere to go except into Qui-Gon's arms. I was shaking so hard, my teeth were chattering. So were his. And still, he would drag this out. Even in our lovemaking, as in all other things, my Master would be thorough.

He shifted over and lay beside me before rolling me into the circle of his arms. He then pulled me against him with an inexorable strength that I could not have refused even if I'd wanted to. I knew my Master to be a powerful man, but I'd never felt him like this, as if all of his usual barriers had been forsaken and I was left with the essential Qui-Gon Jinn, a creature of intense cravings for his Padawan and the need to devour me in ways that I'd never experienced from any partner before.

There was something spellbinding about him tonight, in the way he held me, touched me. A slow, steady beat began between us, foundationed in the bond and echoed in the pit of my stomach as well as in my arousal. Kissing me, Qui-Gon slipped his tongue between my lips briefly, only to withdraw. Over and over again, he did this, while his hips made the same movement against me. His seeping wetness trailed down my thigh, only to mingle with my own wetness.

Wrapping my arms around Qui-Gon's neck, I felt the beat of his heart, swift and hard against my own chest. My fingers tangled in his long hair and tightened convulsively as he kissed me again, the soft growth of his beard caressing my skin. His breath was warm against my face, his hand was moving inexorably to my erection. His eyes were half-lidded, he looked like a man who was very certain of himself, and very much in control.

His hand wrapped around me and I moaned, burrowed against him, and thrust. To be touched, just so, and by my Master... I nearly lost the moment right there as I felt my testicles tighten. Immediately, Qui-Gon's fingers were below, just so, pressing where they needed to deny the inevitable.

"Not yet, Padawan."

Groaning and sucking at his throat, I felt my arousal back off just a bit. Sliding my own hand down Qui-Gon's flank, I found his substantial need and wrapped my fingers around it. Moving in slow, languid strokes, I pressed rhythmically against large erection and relished the moment when he began pressing into the strokes, when his hips began arching in a smooth, rolling motion. The fire cast flickering shadows on his face, emphasizing the outline of his broken nose, the high cheekbones and deepening laugh lines around his eyes as he groaned deep and long, and all for me.

I measured the length of him in a slow, careful massage, marveling at it and cherishing that I could affect him so. His hips moved forward, seeking mine as I stroked him. The throbbing pulse of him matched my own heartbeat -- rapid and strong.

"You need me," he rasped.

"I need you," I agreed.

Easing out of his embrace, I rolled over and snagged a small tube of oil from my utility belt -- oil that I'd taken to carrying with me after Qui-Gon had first kissed me in that club. Rolling back again, I poured the oil out over his erection, an act which elicited a hiss on his part, as the liquid was not warmed.

"That's all right," I whispered, "It will slow things down a little."

"Nothing will slow me down now, Obi-Wan."

Oh, yes, he was arrogant, and I'd not have him any other way. Rolling onto my back, I spread my legs in blatant offering. Qui-Gon raked his eyes over me before moving between my legs and placing my feet to either side of his hips.

"You are sure, Obi-Wan?"

"Hell of a position to get into if I wasn't sure." My fingers trailed over the length of him, played in the natural lubricant that was seeping from his shaft. "I love you. And yes, I'm sure."

He breathed in a hiss and held my gaze as he positioned his heaviness between my legs. "I love you as well, my Obi-Wan."

Shivering, I held myself open. His hands on my buttocks, spreading me, his rapid breathing, the pulsing of his need, all combined to overwhelm me; my Master's touch was a drug that I craved, had no wish to live without.

Leaning in, he kissed me deeply and slid a finger inside of me at the same time. I nearly bit off his tongue at the intimate intrusion, and he raised his head slightly, chuckled at the impatience he felt streaking across the bond to greet him. Setting up a rhythm, that finger moved against the secret place inside me that made my own erection jump up and take extra notice.

He kissed me again, and his need strained against mine. Tension rose between us, our tongues dueling and my hips trying to encourage his invasion in what had become an extremely tight space. Blindly, I reached for him, found him, and pumped in harmony with the blood pulsing between my legs. He returned my kiss fiercely and caressed deeper, adding another finger to the first. And then, his hand moved mine away from him, and another invader took the place of his fingers.

His organ was hot and rigid, larger and more insistent than any other of my lovers had ever been. Qui-Gon's need brooked no refusal and promised total possession. I was hungry to know it. He slipped on the oil just there, an erotic stroking that brought another mindless moan from me. Reconditioning my hips and lifting me slightly, he set himself and drove forward to slide home in a blaze of blunt fire and need. I caught at his arms, which were braced now on either side of me, and tried to surge upward to drive him more deeply into me.

His body shifted to slide further inside of me, with a hard, stinging pressure that made me catch my breath. And then he was filling every inch of me with his thickness, stretching me to the point of pain in the most erotic dance of my life.

Holding my breath, I stared up at him. His silvered hair was a tangled mane cascading about his broad shoulders. Those shoulders were taut even as his face was filled with a glorious, dignified need. He paused with his fullness heavy inside me, letting me adjust to his size as though he knew full well the burden it created for his partner. The look in my Master's eyes was so loving and intense that it left me shattered.

His blue eyes bore into mine with fierce intensity, his lashes shadowed on his cheeks in the firelight. I tightened my muscles, instinctively, gripping him harder and saw a shudder run through him. Lowering his head, he slid further forward with his hardness stretching me even more. His heat was intense, his presence in my mind all-encompassing. I dared to arch my hips upward, desperately seeking completion and release.

"Gods, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon breathed, bracing his forehead against mine.

The next moment, he lunged forward in a move that was as unyielding as it was unexpected, for he was already deep inside of me, as far as he could go. I cried out, welcoming the renewed possession, but Qui-Gon covered my mouth with his own, stealing and swallowing the cry.

His body dragged within me, and a flood of sensations overrode both of us as he continued to move, in and out, in and out, in a drive of shuddering force. My body struggled to accommodate his need and my own, while the clean, musky scent of him filled my senses. Sweat trickled from his hair to drip onto my own cheek. It slid down to the corner of my mouth and I tasted it with my tongue, took it into myself and possessed that part of my Master as he possessed me. His deep growls filled my ears, his fervent kisses were bruising. He was my world and he filled it completely, his power and potent sensuality eclipsing everything else.

He thrust deeply again and again with a ruthless, burning friction, and I wrapped my legs around him, feeling my own erection rub against his stomach. The first tremor of release rocked me and I wailed a warning. Clenching him deep within me, I screamed his name as I came, with Qui-Gon keening loud and long as wave after wave of my release washed through us. And then he was captured by his own release, was thrusting deep in long, sustained strokes that burst within me. Harsh tremors held him captive before he fell half on top of me and went still. Gradually, our ragged breathing began to slow, and when my Master finally moved he withdrew ever so slowly. I gasped at the raw friction that was left between us.

Sated and spent, we lay deeply entangled and barely conscious until the fire had burned down to embers. I came back to the moment to find that Qui-Gon had slid down until he could rest his head on my chest. He slept deeply from the look of it, with my arms wrapped possessively around him. Smiling, I began stroking his hair. After awhile, I too slept. When next I awoke, it was to find my Master lying beside me, watching me. He had stoked the fire and stolen a blanket from the bed for us.

Qui-Gon handed me a mug of tea before kissing me good morning. I sipped the tea and stretched -- a long, languorous stretch that informed me that I would be feeling the results of this very big man's presence inside of me for a few days, a fact that did not displease me.

"Good morning, Master."

"Good morning, Obi-Wan." He kissed me again, and yet again. I decided that I could get used to waking up like this. "Do you mind if I ask you something?"

"It's not the questions I worry about," I quipped, only to sober at the worried look in his eyes. "What is it? What's wrong?"

"How long?" Two little words, holding layers of inquiry.

I thought a moment, and then answered honestly. "At times, it's felt like forever. But I think that it's only been since I was about sixteen."

His fingers smoothed the braid falling over my shoulder. "Then why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you say anything?"

"You were the great Qui-Gon Jinn, I was very young, and you had other lovers. I knew that I didn't stand a chance."

"You could have said something." My Master looked quietly inward for a moment. "Then again, I suppose that you have been saying something, every day over the past half a decade."

I nodded, then rolled over onto my side so that I could look him in the eye more easily. "I've been loving you for a very long time, Master. But you were hurt, sometimes deeply by more than one person, and I knew it. I had twenty different fears regarding it. I didn't want to wreck or put at risk what we already shared. I was afraid that if I told you how I felt, you'd push me away. What if I told you and you didn't feel the same, or if you felt that sex would wreck what we had? Or if you wanted to put me off until I was knighted? Any number of things could have driven us apart, so I thought it best to not begin at all, rather than to be refused."

I shrugged and set aside the tea mug. "In the end, I decided to just loved you the best way I knew how to and trusted that if we were meant, things would naturally happen." I gave a cocky grin and ran a finger down his throat. "Now, it looks like they have."

He rumbled long and low in his throat, stretching like a big cat until my body remembered just how well we fit and craved a repeat of what we'd shared the night before. Understanding, Qui-Gon drew me into the circle of his arms, so warm and so welcome.

"Most of the Temple believes that we're already sleeping together," he observed. "We've just been slow to catch up with the gossip."

"The gossip hasn't bothered me all that much," I confessed. "I thought that if you minded you'd put a stop to it. Since you didn't, I took it as a hopeful sign that the thought of being with me didn't totally repulse you."

He began carding his fingers through my hair, a habit of old that Qui-Gon returned to whenever he was pondering things deeply.

"It's always been *you* that I've wanted, Master," I continued, seeking to reassure him. "It's never been about just having sex with you. This touching that's so new between us is icing on the cake."

"And very nice icing it is, too," he purred, sliding a hand down my flank and across to cup my testicles in his broad palm.

I raised my head in time to see my Master offer a wolf-grin, the sort that I'd never seen before. Laughing, I burrowed in for another all-consuming kiss. About a half-cycle later, when the kisses had ended yet again and we'd made each other boneless, I finally got up my nerve to ask.

"Master, how long?"

"In some respects, forever," he answered carefully. "In others, only a few cycles. I wasn't certain, even after you dared to kiss me in public, at Indiscretions. It took me far too long to see this, and even longer to believe in it. Not because of you, Padawan, but because of past hurts. Perhaps I was deliberately blind, trying to stay in the safe places with you."

"Aren't you the one who says that things happen in their own time as they're meant to happen, and not always in the time we wish them to happen? We've been together, even when we haven't been making love. That's the part that's always mattered to me."

Kisses again on the top of my head. Fingers sifting through my hair, and a wash of love through the bond that took my breath away.

"You're a very generous lover, my Obi-Wan. May we always be together."

***

We returned to Coruscant in good time to announce our lifebonding to the Council, which collectively didn't do much more than make them arch an eyebrow. They were more interested in sending us out immediately on another messy mission. We had time enough to unpack, pack, and catch a quick meal at the commissary. Sleep would come on the ship, after we'd once again made love, of course. Now that the touching had started, it seemed that we wouldn't be stopping for some time.

I handed over our meal trays to the service droid and stopped to talk to my old friend, Garen, who was waiting in the food-line while Qui-Gon stood some distance away, confirming a few last-minute details with Master Windu. A sniffy, eavesdropping Knight Sharat was seated nearby.

"Something's different," Garen was poking. "You and Master Jinn have been all but glowing since you got back from Dorsia."

"We had a good time, Garen. That's all."

Garen snorted. "In a bantha's eye."

Qui-Gon walked up close behind me in that moment and wrapped an arm around me. Purring low, he bent to nibble my ear and share a kiss. "Our ship awaits, Padawan. Are you ready?"

"Always, Master."

He took the time to smooth my braid before sketching a bow to Garen. "It's good to see you, Padawan. Perhaps you and Obi-Wan will have some time to catch up on matters when we return."

"I hope so, Master Jinn."

Sliding a hand down my arm, my Master captured my hand in his own and began leading the way out of the vast room. Catching sight of Dagan, Qui-Gon paused at his table and gazed down at the scowling knight.

"Knight Sharat, how is your relationship with Zachrat coming along?"

Dagan mumbled something unintelligible into his cup.

"I'm sorry to hear that, but you must be very happy for him. And you're looking well, so independent missions must agree with you. The Force be with you, Dagan." Bowing slightly, Qui-Gon led me away from his erstwhile lover.

Upon our return from Dorsia, Qui-Gon had insisted upon a small change in our Master/Padawan presentation: there was to be no more of my walking three subservient steps behind his left shoulder. I had been ordered to walk beside him where, more often than not, I found myself tucked beneath his broad shoulder or tugged along with my hand in his.

Tightening my grip on that hand, I decided that being held by Qui-Gon was a very nice thing to be.

END